Lost love
by It's only a dream. Or not
Summary: Alice is haunted by the same dream every night. The only thing is, it s not a dream. It's a memory. She remembers everything about Underland. Especially the death of the only person she ever loved. Who will be waiting for her when she goes back? Will she even want to go back? Btw:'z I don't own Alice in Wonderland. Doy
1. Chapter 1

I was running. What was I running from? Why was I running from it? All I knew was that if I didn't run I was going to die. Sweat and dirt ran down my face. I could taste it. The smell of death and fear filled the air making my nose cringe. I lifted my head in time to see a boy in front of me. He was standing about six or seven yards away, holding his arms out to me, calling for me. I wanted to be with him so bad it hurt. My foot slipped and I fell. I watched darkness consume him. I heard him scream my name. His name escaped my lips, but only as a whisper. My body hit the ground with full impact. Blood covered the ground and me. I was just looking at my own body, mangled, and dead.

I woke with tears streaming down my face and a deep pain in my heart. My knees curled to my chest as I cried and screamed. I still remembered Underland. Part of me wanted to, but the other wanted to forget it and never look back.

My alarm started screaming it's annoying sounds at me. Telling me to get up and go to school. Feeling hurt in so many ways, I got out of bed and went to my , I grabbed a pair of ripped jeans and a shirt with blood scratches across it. Then I trailed to my bathroom and got dressed. Once I walked the bathroom and pulled my shirt off, i reveled a set of bruses on my back. A reminder that would never disappear.


	2. Chapter 2

Once I was dressed I walked out, slipped some socks on and my thi hi black and white converse. My babkback was at school in my locker so I didn't have to worry about it right then. My feet quietly went down the stairs and to the front door.

A cold burst of air hit my face so I grabbed my jacket that hung by the door. I made footprint's in the snow as I made my way to school. I had always loved winter, because of the white snow and the freezing cold temperature's.

No one talked to me in school, really. The teachers didn't even like me. It was all because of my stupid cousins, Clarie, and Marcy. I had been living with them and my aunt since I was around six, so, around ten years. The way they treated me was like trash. I hated my life so much I started to cu myself. I thought it helped me. I had thought that if I caused myself pain, it would help ease the pain I had on the inside.

People didn't even bother to say hi to me as I walked to my locker. One girl finally got the courage to ask me a question. "Alice, right?" I opened my mouth to say something back but she put her hand in my face. "I don't want to hear your snyde remark." She put her hand down. "Where are Clarie and Marcy?"

The way her words came out made me want to beat the living hell out of her. I managed to refrain myself long enough to say something back. "Both. Of them are in Hawaii for the rest of the month with my aunt." A stupid look marked her face like a scar as she walked back to her group of clones.

The first Bell rung so I grabbed my bag and walked into class. The whole day was just as boring as the last, work, sleep, watch a video. Nothing ever new.

The last class I had last period was history, and for some reason (my cousins probably) the teacher hated me. I was done with my workshet so I stared off into space. Thinking about Underland. Remembering my friends, the ones who wanted me. There was Hatter; he had the wickediest hat ever. He would pull the deadliest weapons from it. Then there were the tweedles; Dee could get inside your mind, and Fun would torture you. March was the one who please cleaned up the blood, and usually us. White had the power to see small glimpses of the future, but nothing much. Then there was Ches. He could disappear and reappear, and cut your head clean off with his razor like tail. He was also our bomb maker; he liked it when things went down in flames.

"Alice?" My grumpy teacher snarled. "Lost in Wonderland again?" He alwase made those stupid comments. He alwase made fun of me, saying that since I had Raven black hair and wasnt so perky I couldn't be the real Alice. Then he would say, oh but you do have the same eyes and completion. Lets not forget, your just as stupid.


	3. Bloody pain

I was walking home from school feeling like I was going to cry. Why did he have to say those things? I hated school, and I hated my damn history teacher. My body felt cold but not cold enough for me. My arms slid through my jacket sleeves so the cold would capture me in its freezing warmth. Snowflakes fell from the sky and danced to the ground. One landed on my nose and I couldn't help but laugh.

My house was about three blocked away from school so it wasn't aproblem getting back and forth. The big blue, two storey house was ghost empty. It was just going to be me for the next two and a half weeks. No cousins to make me mad. No aunt to torture me. I was alone, just the way I liked it. I ran inside, threw my bag on the floor, went to the kitchen and raided the snackes. There were cookies of all kinds, mountains of chocalet bars, twix, three musketeers, ect. Once I had all my delightful junk foods I went into the living room and ploped down.

My hand was on the remote and a chocolate bar was in my mouth. I went to press a button but I heard a voice coming from my room upstairs. Keeping the candy in my mouth, but leaving the remote on the couch, I walked upstairs. I couldn't make out the voice before, but I could when I got to my door. The voice didn't scare me, it drew me in, compelling me to come to it. "Alice!" It said in a loud, but whispering voice. I fell to my knees when I opened the door. He was standing right there in front of me. His dark brown hair was a complete mess, and his skin was so dirty he looked a shade darker than he really was. But most of all, his deep green eyes. They looked sad and angry but also torn. He screamed my name in a whispering voice again. "Alice!"

I stood up as fast as I could and scrambled to him, but when I went to wrap him in my arms he vanished. My heart felt as if it was stuck through with a knife. My body gave out and crumbled into a heap on the floor. Unbearable pain scared me on the inside. My hand instinctively reached under my bed for the blade taped to the top. Before I could do anything else I slid the knife across my wrist, one, two, three, times. Blood ran down my wrist just as fast as my tears ran down my face.

I lay on the floor staring at the beautiful knife in my right hand. It had the shinest blade that had the words, _If you wish to know the answer to the riddle, why is a wraven like a writing desk, you will come back._ The handle was made of wood carved with designs by Ches. When I left at the age of seven, I absolutely couldn't believe that they had given me a knife, but I took it as a memento.

I felt sleepy as the blood rushed from my wrist. The last thing I remembered saying was his name. Not loudly or in my head, but as I did when I fell, in a faint whisper. "Aron."


	4. Chapter 4

I knew I was dreaming when I saw him again. His eyes were still filled with sadness and pain, but he looked nicer. His black hair was combed and he wore a black suit. Instead of calling my name he actually spoke. "Alice, I need you." He held his arms out to me. "I need you to find me. Never leave me again, Alice."

My body felt numb when I woke, but I was used to it. Blood covered the floor where it lay, and my arm. The blood was smeared across it like somebody had taken a paintbrush and colored my whole lower arm. The beautiful knife was still in my right hand. I forced myself to get up and put the knife back under my bed. My head turned to the clock on my nightstand. It was six thirty, but I knew I wasn't going back to bed. I didnt want to dream about him again.

I pushed myself off the ground and headed to my closet. Once I opened it I pulled out my black jeans with blue neon paint splattered across them. Then I pulled out my short sleeve black shirt with the words, _loyalty is earned, respect is returned._ I trailed to the bathroom and pulled a rag out of my cabinet and ran my wrist under water. My wrist stung as I let the water run over it and rubbed the rag over it. When I finished washing off the crime scene from my arm, I stripped down and slipped into my clean cloths.

Feeling like I had just been thrown into complete darkness, I slowly walked out of my room down the stairs, grabbed my bag, and went out the door. Snow was still falling, chilling my arms. There were no other marks but my own, until I was about a block away from school. There was a white rabbit design in the snow making me stop to look. Every curve was perfect, every indent in the snow was flawless. I dropped my bag in the snow and put my hand on it. It was stiff at first but after a second it started to colaps. The thing was that, I wasn't even pushing on it. Suddenly a gigantic hole opened up making my knees fall and down I went with them.

Bones and flesh lined the walls of the hole. Things fell and flew across the darkness. Pretty soon the light from above vanished and I was left alone in the dark hole, still falling.

I was in so much shock that I couldn't even scream. It felt as if something was aproching fast. I didn't know if I was looking up or down anymore. I was so scared, so frightened. My heart was pounding, trying to jump out of my chest at an attempt to try and escape death.

I hit the ground so hard it knocked me out. That's when I realized I had been facing up the whole time.


	5. Chapter 5

**ok I know I haven't done the AN in any other of my** ** _short_** **chapters (sorry about that.) But oh well. I hope you have liked my story so far and the for reading it. If you would like to give me any suggestions on what** ** _you_** **think should happen, let me know. Oh yeah and I'm really sorry about all of the typos on here.**

My eyes slid open causing a deep pain in my head. A sliver of light flickered in the corner of my eye. I knew that I had to get to the light so I could see where I had landed. Forcing myself to get up off the ground, I limped my way to the flickering light. The source of the light was a small candle. Underneath the burning flame sat a chain with an amazing key attached to it. The handle of the key was a heart and inside of the heart was a scull. For some odd reason, I knew I would need it. I knew that it would save my life some day. I lifted the candle and held the key in my hand. Sitting next to the candle was a wine glass that I hadn't noticed before. A dark red thick liquid filled the glass. At that moment I knew it was blood, but who's blood was it? I put the key around my neck and wasbbed the wine glass. The words _ **Drink Me**_ were written in shiney gold on the thick, but not to thick rim.

"I knew you would come!" The voice scared me and I jumped causing the glass in my hand to fall and shattered on the ground. I screamed and jumped when the glass shattred. "Calm now Alice. Its only me." A red headed man came from the shadows. "Do you remember me, Alice?" His look was excited, but also worried.

I didn't have to think on that question for a second. I knew exactly who he was and I knew where I was. I was in Sunderland. "Hatter!" I screamed and started limping as fast as I could to him. My vision started to blur and I started to see doubles, tipples, then quadruple's. My legs gave out and I fell, but this time I didn't hit the ground.


	6. Chapter 6

I woke to the sounds of screaming. "We must take her to her aunt, now!" One person yelled. "No we must keep her here until she is well enough to defend herself!" The other yelled.

"Why don't we let her decide?" Another voice broke through. Everyone else went silent. There were only the sounds of the three people breathing.

I opened my eyes and found boy that looked around my age floating at the edg of my bed. I knew who he was. "Che's." I whispered in astonishment. A big grin spread across his face and his pink and purple striped tail swung back and forth behind him.

In less than a second he was gone, but then he reappeared by my side. Behind him were my tweedles. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum looked at me with amazement in there eyes. They both looked almost exactly the same; both had electric blue hair and a tanish skin tone, but the only thing that was different from the other was that Dum had one purple eye and one golden one. Dee on the other hand had just purple eyes. I had missed them so much. Dee looked at me and asked. "Alice why don't you answer our question for us?" Dum walked over to the side of my bed and gave me a cocy grin. "Yeah Alice, it'll be just like old times."

I sat up and almost immediately grabbed my throbbing head. Che's held up a cup in front of my face. I took it and guzzled it down. The pain in my head started to subsid, but there was a terrible taste on my toung afterwards. "What was in that?" Everyone laughed.

Dum took the cup and set it down on the floor by my bed. "Its just a bunch ofthings Hatter mixed together. He said it was a pain potion." He waved it off like it was a fly. "Now, will you answer our question?" He came and sat beside me again.

I had a couple questions first. "As long as you answer my questions first." I crossed my arms and he nodded. "OK here it goes. Who is my aunt, how did I get here, and why do I keep having dreams about... Him" A shiver went down my spine when I asked that last question.

Dee and Dum stood still, in 's mouth hung wide open. Shaking his head and clearing his throat Ches looked me in the eye. "You mean... Him! When did you start dreaming about him?" The door opened behind the Tweedles and Hatter walked in. He was covered in dirt and black goo from head to toe. My feet hit the ground and I ran to him. My knee still hurt but I worked passed the pain. "What happened to you?" Che's asked as he appeared beside Hatter.

"I was checking the perimeter for any fears, when I got ambushed." I saw some red coming from his shoulder. A frightened look washed across his face when he looked at me. "There after _you_ Alice." He walked right by me and reached under the bed. After a second the bed flipped up and underneath was shirts, and a wardrobe. Cloak's, jeans, boots, and shirts. "Gear up, we need to leave, now!" He threw a shirt, a pair of jeans, and a cloak at me. "Put those on for protection." He damanded.

Dum sat down on the floor and started pulling stuff out for everyone else. "Are we taking her to her aunt?" He asked as he threw cloths at Dee and Che's and Hatter. Dee and Che's left to get dressed in another room while Dum was still looking at Hatter. Hatter gave Dee a little nod and left to change with the others. "You can change in here, but hurry. From the looks of Hatter, I bet there's more coming." With that he left me alone to think and change.

All of the clothing fit me perfictly. Everything was compfy nothing was to tight or to loose. "I'm done!" I yelled, and one by one all of them started to file outout of the other room. "Before we go, who is my aunt, and what was that talk about fears?" I still didn't know anything.

Dee sighed. "Alice was up there so long, she started to forget." Dee looked me in the eye. "Alice, your aunt is the Red Queen. Are you sure you don't remember what fears are?" I shook my head. I mean, of course knew what fears were, but obviously they were something way more here than on earth. "Fears are just like they are up there, only they come to life here and kill."

A memory flashed in front of my eyes. I was running from a horde of fears with, him, in front of me. We were both running but he was faster than me. He jumped over the whole and into the safe zone and reached out for me. Calling to me. I ended up tripping and falling into the hole. I watched the fears break through the barrier and smash into him.

Chris was shaking me until I told him to cut it out. After that he backed up and just stood there. Everyone was staring at me like I had turned into some sort of monster. "What?" I asked. Then I realized that I was on the floor. "What happened?" I stood up and looked at the four of them.

Dum stepped forword. "Alice, you were screaming Ar-"

I cut him off and screamed. "Don't say his name!" I hit my knees and put my hands over my ears. "If you say his his name I'll sever your head from your body! Got that!?"

All of them looked at me like I was crazy. I stood up and walked out the door. They trailed behind me silently. I was just walking absent mindedly when I felt someone grab my arm. I looked in front of me and saw where I was. I was where it happened. I was where I fell. I was where, he, died.


	7. Chapter 7

There I stood. Right where it had happened. Hatter had told me to jump across, but I was to frightened. Ches appeared on the other side of the hole. I could jump. I knew I could, but I was to shocked. I saw flashes of his face. Hatter told ches to carry me over the hole, and Ches did as he was told. I could feel the warmth coming from Ches's skin. The smell of vodka made its way into my nose. People believed that it was tea in there cups. Oh, but, it was everything but tea. I also remembered how auntie Red would take me to her castle when Hatter and the rest of them got a bit to tipsy. That's how I met him. He had been running around the castle when my aunt and his step mother had been talking about a piece treaty. We played so many fun games, talked, and danced. I knew from the moment I looked into his bright green eyes, that he was the one. When they were done talking about the piece treaty, they had to leave. Then aunt Red told me that it wasn't signed.

I started to notice my surroundings. There were tall, dead, black, flowers standing tall above us. There were three safe zones in Underland. The first was Queen Red's castle. Second was Queen White's castle. Third, was the Forest of Flowers. Colors bursted from the flowers and conversations never stopped, before. Now it was darker than ever, and there wasn't a single sound stirring amongst the darkness.

Ches looked down at me and smiled a wide grin. His blue eyes shimmered through the darkness and his dark purple hair hid his lighter purple ears. I missed my friends so much. I missed the way Ches and Hatter argued, but always made up later on, and how Dee and Dum disagreed on just about everything but in the end came up with a better solution. Then there were White and March; they almost never disagreed on anything, but if they did, leave them alone and wait for them to decide who was right. The most odd thing was that they were one of the maddest people in Underland but they were the most normal people I had ever met down here. Speeking of the two. "Where are White and March?" Ches set me down and we kept walking through the dead rotten flowers.

"There with Queen Red." He said as he took a dead flower pettal from the ground and smiled as it crumbled in his hands. "Do you remember when I first took you here?" His eyes gleamed k with happiness as I nodded, remembering that night. His hand was tight around mine as he drug me through the Forest of Flowers. The flowers were emanating a beautiful smell that filled the air. We lifted off the ground and into the sky onto a soft purple petal and watched the stars for hours until my aunt called for us.

I gave a laugh when I turned to see Dee and Dum panting as they carried Hatter. Both mouthed the words, _help us! He's so heavy!_ Hatter looked at them then at me and gave a shrug. "What? I'm injured and tired." He said as he stood- both boys slumped in relief. All three of them jogged to me and looked up.

My mind filled with curiosity. Once I looked at what they were staring at, I knew why they were staring. "Were here." I said in an almost whispering voice. We were finally at my aunt's castle. It stood so high above the ground I felt a bit nauseous. Red and black covered all the walls and roofs making part of the castle look like it was surrounded by a heart. The path ahead of us started to clear out so we jogged for a little while until I felt as if my lungs were going to jump out of my throat and take a long nap. With a bit of rest we kept walking until we were about a mile away from our destination. The grey dirty ground started to turn to a white cleanly-ish stone. The sun started to go down and the two moons started to rise in the already stary sky. Nobody said a single thing as we made our way down the white road. In a way I kind of felt like Dorthy following the yellow brick road to the magician, but I was headed for one of the maddest people in Underland, my aunt Red.

A voice carried on the wind into my ears. "Find me Alice. Save me." I herd his voice crack through my skull like a razor blade. A small breeze blew by and ruffled my raven hair, but there was no little voice in it. Only dead silence to be herd. Tears fell down my face as I thought of him. I quickly made sure to wipe the tears away before any body noticed.

The castle grew closer and the night was dark. I could see people roaming about inside of the red gates. Beautiful dresses were worn and hair was pulled up into odd doos. A card guard stood at the gate with his sharp weapon ready to be used. "What are you here for?" He stated. All four boys were standing in front of me, like they were trying to protect me from danger. Dee reached back to me and took my hand pulling me in front of him. The gaurd gasped and started spewing apologies all over the place. Saying that he didn't know it was me and that he would have the gate opened as soon as possible. He ran to the front of the gate and was yelling at other guards to open the gate, that Alice is here.

Red gates opened and a horn was blown so loud that I had to cover my ears. People started taking to one another and trying to get close enough to examine me. So many voices were going off, I couldn't understand a single one. Someone reached out and grabbed my left wrist making me wince and hiss in pain. Hatter quickly removed the anonymous persons hand and we kept walking down the path till we reached the steps leading to the big red and black door. When we reached the top of the steps both doors busted open and a tall woman with blood red hair and a deep red dress that fit her slender body quite will, ran to me and basically tackled me in a hug. I had to pry her off so we could go in side.

"Alice, I can't believe your here!" She ran to the stares on the left side of the room and started walking up. "Come, Alice. Your room is this way. Boys I trust you can find your original rooms, yes?" She asked staring daggers at them. The four of them nodded and went to there rooms up the same stairs, but they were much quicker.

Once I caught up to Red half way up the stairs, she took my left hand in hers. "Alice, I'm so glad your here! Are you hungry? Dinner will be ready in an hour." She explained. "The fairies will run a nice hot bath for you, and when you are done there is a closet full of clothing that will suit to your taste." With that she took me up the stairs, still holding my hand, and took so many turns, I thought I would get lost on my way back. We stopped at a wooden door with the prettiest designes leading to the top where my name sat. "Here you are. I'll see you at dinner, oh, and Alice, don't mention the White Queen around the fairies, they don't like her." Then she disappeared around a corner.

I opened my door, stepped into my room and quickly shut it. A bed sat on the right side of the room with bright pink blankets and pillows. I almost threw up when I saw how much pink covered the bed. One bright green dresser stood agenst the wall straight ahead of me. What was with the bright colors?

Something flickered on the left side of the room. As I made my way, I noticed that there was a door barely cracked open. On the other side was at least ten to fifteen glowing sparkles flying across what looked like a humongous bathroom. A tub sat directly in the middle of the room with the toilet and sink off to the right of the room and a set of mirrors that went from the floor to the ceiling. The walls and roof were a light shade of tan and the floor was a dark wood. All the lights in the room stopped. Then they finished filling the tub and getting various sites ready for me. Once they were done they scattered out of the room, but I bought sight of one as it flew by. It's wings dripped with some sort of whit-ish goo and its whole body was nothing but a skeleton. Dark scary black eyes were buried deep inside there skulls.

Feeling like I had fought a thousand people and lost, I was glad to strip down and crawl into the steaming hot bath. My akes and bruises screamed at me when I let the hot water surround them. Everything in the world seemed to melt away when I lay back and closed my eyes.

His image flashed in front of me. "Alice! Alice, I need you to save me!" He called for me.


End file.
